Good enough.

Have you ever been living your merry life and dealing with random, mostly physical, insecurities when suddenly a freight train of insecurity comes out of nowhere and runs you down. I mean, seriously, no train tracks, no horn, no sign of this thing until WHAM! You’ve been run down and are left laying there going “man, I’m so not good enough.”
Yeah, that just happened. So, if you’ve read any of my other posts this is pretty obvious but please allow me to state the obvious as I am a captain f it, I am a Christian. I’m also human. I’ve never considered myself a great Christian. To be honest, I pretty much suck at it most times. I read a few verses daily (mostly because they’re in my newsfeed on Facebook) and I do devotionals through my app inconsistently. The one thing I’m really awesome at is talking to God. Even before I began an actual relationship with God I talked to Him. I’m pretty sure I have never gone a day without talking to God. Every once in awhile I’ll listen, and man it works out awesomely when I do!
When it comes to all those amazing Christian women who are soft spoken and always have a kind word to say and a serene smile on their faces, that’s not me. I’m loud, obnoxious, my mouth speaks faster than my mind can keep up with, I say mean things, I say wrong things, I often prove to be a fool, my face is an open book and that book is VERY animated, and gracefulness is rarely found when I move. I did discover that I’m not too shabby at yoga when making a video of my hilarious antics in trying to do yoga with small children though! I am far from the epitome of a good Christian woman. I’ve been mostly ok with that though. I have always felt that God loves me for who I am because He made me who I am. He made us each different so we can reach different.
Until today. I began reading a fellow Christian mom’s fb page and suddenly became aware of how I’m not measuring up to her standard. Not that she’s even given me her standard. This just suddenly popped in and ran me over. I am feeling like I need to step it up as a Christian and be more like all the quiet, calm, women I see.
But then, this quiet voice tells me, (and we KNOW that’s not me cause quiet voices and I are only in acquaintance because of bedtime and nap time), ‘How boring would it be with everyone exactly the same. Let her be perfect as she is and why don’t you be perfect as you are. You know, the way God made you. You are good enough!’
Yep. So. Anyone out there reading this. Be you. Exactly as God made you. You are good enough and He loves you! Look for the goals that HE sets for you, don’t try to reach for goals that He’s set for someone else. You’ll have no passion for them and will fall flat.

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